Saturday, March 8, 2008

My 2 Buddies Have Referrals

We use the same agency and are at the same place with our adoption process. I am so excited for both of them because we are all 3 at the same stage. They were waiting infant girls. I saw Shawn's picture of her baby girl and she is just adorable. This will be Shawn's first child. Lory is still waiting for some paperwork about her baby girl, but it must feel great to have that referral. Our Dossier should have been translated by now and probably approved in Ethiopia by the Ministry of Women's Affairs (MOWA). We wait for our agency to tell us that we have a court date which will be handled over there by our facilitator, who I hear is amazing!! I can't wait to meet him.

Today is our 3rd of 5 adoption classes. Six hours long, but always full of really useful information about this process. They talk about it from every angle so there are no surprises. What I'm reading from many other people's blogs who are adopting from Ethiopia is that when they come home with you, it can be like postpartum depression. Like, for a year, you are envisioning this adorable little person coming into your home. You assume they will be happy because you have EVERYTHING for them and they long for nothing....so you think! But sometimes, not all the time, the attachment can be a challenge, the wanting of their familiarity can make them scared and confused....

I recently read about a new adoptive mom packing the backpack to go to the park and the 6 year old freaked out thinking they were packing her up to go back. In her little mind, once again she was being carted off to who knows where. She the thought she was never going to see this family again. It just broke my heart when I read that. (And I've read how some other children will just eat all day long, thinking that they're next meal may not come for a while. Or hide their toys thinking that it was not theirs to keep. It's just heartbreaking!!)

They didn't know why she was acting strange, so they called up their Ethiopian friend who spoke Amharic who enlightened them as to why she freaked out. I think I need to make some Amharic Flashcards with standard phrases on them to use when they are here. So anyway, the classes help to put things into perspective. I am expecting anything can happen when our girls get here, so that we are prepared for anything that MAY happen. What I do know is that it does take on average 18 months for everything to fall into place. But it also can go very smoothly.

This wait it difficult. I'm putting an incredible amount of trust in the hands of my agency. I am a Mama Bear at heart and will make sure all is well in the end though. Those of you who know me (and David) know that we are fighters and we always WIN!!

I look forward to our class today and am thrilled about my 2 friends' referrals!

6 comments:

Scott and Leah Reeves said...

Hi Lisa,

We are Leah and Scott Reeves. We are also with IAN and just got a court date for March 12. I am just starting to put together a blog page about our adoption....a little late. I have been reading yours and am very excited for you family. I saw the vidoe of your boy's reaction to the adoption, that said it all. I hope to chat more in the future.-Leah Reeves

Lisa W. said...

Hi Leah,
I heard about someone's court date, but didn't know whose it was. So you will be traveling in April Wow! Let me know when your blog is up. It's really easy to do. You must be thrilled. Contact me to talk, okay?

Lisa W. said...

Leah,
Oh My goodness!! I just saw your baby's picture and she is stunning. How adorable. Blessings to you and safe travels. Lots of pictures. What orphanage is she in? You may be taking pictures of our 2 girls when you are there!!!

SDR said...

Hey Lisa - if you haven't already, you should get the book Adoption Parenting: Creating a Toolbox, Building Connections from amazon. Its really good.

LISA said...

Wow! Cute baby Reeves family!!!
Lisa, Just checkin' in to see how ya'll are doing with the wait.I'm not being very patient....

Lisa W. said...

Lisa,
I'm okay. The wait sucks. Only that I feel like I'm in the dark. Yesterday we had lunch with our beautiful Ethiopian friends from our ET church. I will blog about it later, but wow, what a blessing. You hang in there too. Email me if you'd like to talk. It helps me to talk too.